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Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Van Halen Concert Leads to Ancient Civilization Discovery




(New civilization discovered at 12:18...you're welcome) 



While I am not a scholar of anything (unless you count the Life Sex Death YouTube catalog), I am pretty sure Baltimorewashington is some sort of ancient civilization like Hammerjacks, Jaxx, or Cleveland, Ohio.  After doing some more research, it appears that this Baltimorewashington place was pretty kick ass.

There's actually quite a lot of footage on the YouTube of this magical place. In fact, there's an entire documentary on it featuring Justin Hawkins (I never knew how much he hated punk).


This got me kinda pissed too...think of all the wasted money spent on grad students flying all over the place to learn about and "research" stuff...if they're so smart, why can't they figure out how to get an Internet connection?  Think about it...I just discovered an ancient civilization for whatever my neighbor pays for an hour of his monthly internet service fee...not to mention I didn't even have to pack an extra pair of tube socks (I've heard that's what you pack for traveling).  If I had a grant...say $1k or whatever they get, I would have a crap ton left over to do something worthwhile.  You know, like pay Dave Mustaine to reenact his scenes from Some Kind Of Monster Disc 2 live in my living room...




or at least get some new snow tires for my '85 Plymouth Coke Sled...errr…Duster.



All I'm saying is that smart people aren't all that smart if you think about it.

Back to Baltimorewashington...

The cultural hub seems to have been some parking lot.

Apparently Dokken played there like every weekend...


They had jacked up trucks...



Hell...even Neil Diamond played there.


So what happened to this place?  Best I can tell is that it's some shitty mall now.  What a waste of an awesome parking lot.  I only hope I live long enough to see the day when people pull their heads out of their asses long enough to recognize this place as the historic landmark that it should be.

It really pains me to think of all the helpless IROCs that got senselessly bulldozed to put up a TCBY.  Thankfully, we have the YouTube to keep the memories alive.



2 comments:

  1. I've been to this civilization, in this Firebird I'm sitting on.

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  2. Candii, you are livin' the dream!!! FYI - I always refer to "the dream" as being able to replace all my couches (even the one on the front porch) with the front ends of Firebirds. I just think that would be dope as f'n hell!!

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